Let the Countdown Begin!

So, the DZR and I decided on a place and set a date: Sunday, September 2, 2012 at The Stone Barn in my hometown, Kennett Square, PA.

I’m a little bit back-logged on keeping track of everything exciting that has happened.

Last Saturday, we went with both sets of our parents to The Foxfire for the most delicious dinner I’ve had a while (no offense, Mom). I left my phone at home and I didn’t want to hassle everyone, so unfortunately, there are no pictures of my delicious meal. It’s probably better this way. Our meals were so delicious, your eyes would have wept at the sight of our table. I will tell you that my dad had the Lobster Risotto and I ate the mixed grill (which had lamb, duck, AND pork belly…mmmmmm).

After dinner, everyone, except me, took a walk around the grounds and we all decided that this was probably the place DZR and I will get MARRIED. The DZR wanted to be sure of the inside of The Mill, so we set up an appointment to come back.

Monday, DZR, my mom, and I made detour to The Stone Barn on our way out to Pittsburgh. We had an emergency reconnaissance mission to get things I needed and to take care of some of my apartment stuff out there. You know that your beyonce’ loves you when he agrees to make a 10-hour drive in 20-hours with you, your mom and no air conditioning. KEEPER.

After walking half-way through The Mill, DZR asked me if we should just set a date. His confidence gave me the confidence to commit to a date!! I hadn’t expected to pick a time and place so soon, but we did and it feels great. My mom, the saint that she is, offered to help us put down the deposit for the date and, after hammering out some details, we’re locked in! I can’t believe it!

Our quick trip to Pittsburgh was brutal but I was reminded of a few important things:

Family is there for you: My mom rules and I know she would do almost anything for me. I am so grateful for her positivity and support. I can’t wait to live closer to her.

Friends greet you with smiles: Our two friends, Lauren and Eli, had us stay in their air-conditioned house overnight. As soon as we all sat down I realized that it felt like I hadn’t seen them in a million years. And I had missed them dearly. It sounds totally cheesy but there is nothing in the world like good friends.

When things get shitty, look in the mirror: I found myself in cranky fits during moments in our trip. I am not proud of this. When tensions started to rise, I really tried hard to check myself and see what I could do differently/better. Everyday, I’m working to consider other people’s feelings before expressing my own. (Not an easy task!)

This is it:  The more time I spend with the DZR, the more I am re-affirmed that this is the person I want to be with forever.  The good times. The bad times. And even the hot, smelly, greasy, country-music, car times.

Wedding Countdown:

400 days

Quick Update

DZR and I took a little drive this morning and we saw the outside view of The Stone Barn. He said he had a good feeling about it too. We’re planning to have lunch with our families there next weekend (!!!).

We’re keeping a few (funny) counts of things as we go through this wedding planning process.

The Count

Elope Count: 4.5

Dreams about Wedding Disasters: 2

The DCCA

Image from Smithsonian Magazine

Today, the DZR, Peapod, my dad, and I went and checked out The Delaware Center for the Contemporary Arts. The DCCA is an art museum with seven galleries and rotating exhibits.

The space is open and “industrial-chic”– leaving a lot of room for a custom design to be set up for each kind of event. The pictures of weddings hosted at The DCCA really lured me into seeing it for myself, ASAP. I even made the DZR drive by the building a few days ago, just to get a peek at the area.

I didn’t take any pictures of the museum– mostly because I was busy scooching around in a wheelchair, looking at The Elliptical Frontiers, the Cause and Effect, and the Unguarded Naratives exhibits. The space itself is great both as an art museum and as a wedding venue. The galleries could make for some awesome photographs, that is, if the exhibits that are up when we get married are just as stunning as the ones we saw today.

The only way to analyze our thoughts on this place is to do a Pro/Con list:

PROS

• The museum is located in an area of Wilmington Delaware where hotels and other niceties are nearby
• If we were married in the late Fall/Winter, the parking lot and area would be cleared of snow
• The space is a “blank canvas” and can be made into whatever we want with our decorations and set up
• They have a long list of caterers we can work with
• Our ceremony location would be an auditorium where we could use their AV equipment
• BOYB-ing is the only way we can get delicious beverages inside
• The DCCA is a non-profit, so by using their services, we would be supporting a place that brings art to the public–they don’t even charge admission to visit! (Also, would the expense of our event be considered a “donation” and would we get a tax break for hosting it there?)

CONS

• By using a space that does not exclusively deal with these kinds of events, we would have to secure many other services (caterers, waitstaff, linens, decorations, etc). While a catering company would take care of most of that, there are things we’d have to pay extra or make arrangements for (like, who would set up the additional decorations for the ceremony the day of? Would the DZR and I literally be hanging Christmas lights an hour before we get married?)
• It’s located in Delaware, so a self-uniting ceremony is not an option
• The space is not one big open space. It has nooks and crannies, which we both like, however, as our guest list grows, we see the benefits of having a large area to work with. For example, we want everyone to be able to see the “head table” from their dinner seats, (if we have one.)
• There’s not a lot of greenery. We will have to either bring it in or sacrifice it. The more I think about it, the more I appreciate the presence of nature in our wedding and reception
• Having access to the galleries during the party is nice, but what about the artwork? It’s a nice conversation piece for everyone, but what if someone spills or wrecks something? I almost wheeled over part of an installation today, and we were the only group in there. What if someone is put off by something there? (Which, honestly, whatever, but imagining a relative being offended by a piece of art– and having that ruin people’s time sounds like a headache. Ugh.) Plus, we would need to take out insurance for our event…

I liked the DCCA and so did the DZR, but for now, we don’t think it’s our number one spot. We just can’t imagine getting married there right now. We’re very fortunate that we’re able to be flexible about our date and we are going to look at a few more places before narrowing down our options.

Visiting a potential location with the DZR was really nice. Seeing The Stone Barn with my mom was also great, however, looking at the face of your beyonce’ while you try to imagine yourself saying your vows or cutting your cake really puts things in perspective. I want to enjoy every minute of our wedding ceremony and reception. I don’t want to worry about whether or not the outside caterers will remember to bring extra cake plates or if my friends will get drunk and make their own “art” in a gallery (by “art,” I mean “puke”). If someone makes “art” outside, in nature, it’s not a big deal. If someone makes “art” on an installation, I’ll be mad. Like, real mad.

The Stone Barn

The Mill at The Stone Barn

Today, my mom and I scoped out our first venue, The Stone Barn, in my hometown of Kennett Square, Pennsylvania. It was actually the first place Google recommended when I did a preliminary search of wedding venues in the area. I have a really good feeling about this place, but I’m trying to not let that cloud my judgment. I’m keeping an open mind of all possibilities and not rushing into anything.

I received a packet via email a few days ago after I called and set up an appointment to tour the facility. Compared to what I’ve seen on websites for other local places, like The Mendenhall Inn or Loch Narin, I found the food options at The Stone Barn much more agreeable right off the bat. I recognize that once you actually commit to a location, the event planners and food-service providers will work with you, however, it’s always nice to start with a reasonable framework. I still have other places to check, but some are rated higher on our wish-list.

The view from the back of The Mill

DZR and I are still pretty sure we want to do our ceremony on the same site as our reception. What’s awesome about The Stone Barn is their contingency plans for inclement weather. There are two venues, a larger one (The Mill) and a smaller one (The Stone Barn, which also houses the Foxfire restaurant). Each has an outdoor area where a ceremony can be performed AND either an indoor or sheltered area for ceremonies, as a rainy-day option.

One of the ceremony sites..so pretty!

Let me tell you that The Mill is really cool. The ceremony site is next to two small ponds and a working water mill! There are also areas for pictures like a bridge and a dock-looking deck on the water. The walkways and patios around the building are perfect for cocktails. So nice!

A view of one of the patios

Inside the Mill is insanely cute and rustic. The bones of the main hall were strong, distinctive, and inviting in the late-afternoon sunlight. The chairs are actually handsome, solid wood instead of blah-looking folding chairs.  Even though it definitely needs some decorations, the foundation is pleasant to begin with; it’s the kind of place you can envision a wedding.

Inside the reception area

Like I said, I’m keeping my options open. I WILL say, my most recent dream/goal for my wedding is to drink beer out of a mason jar (classy, right?). I am glad that we got some preliminary information on our first potential site– and we’re still considering it!  My mom wants us to eat at The Stone Barn’s restaurant this summer to get an idea of what their food is about. The gentleman who showed us around discussed how they try to grow as much food as they can on-site or source it locally (yay!) Their lettuce boxes by the office were so pretty, I wanted to nom nom on an impromptu salad right there…but I guess I have to wait a few more days.

Another shot of The Mill

An alternate view of the patio area